I don’t claim to be a psychologist, sociologist, or expert on human relations. I’m far from any of these designations! In fact, I am a normal person who has had her share of obsessive moments, and over the years, I have learned that obsessing over certain issues is really a lost cause. From my modest, not so flattering, life experiences I have created a list of what I believe are the fifteen things we should not obsess about. It is not a list based on scientific fact, but rather my questionable thoughts. So read it, enjoy it, and do Feel free to challenge me, agree, or disagree. Also, if you have other items to add to it, do so. So here is my list, in no particular order, as I feel all these equally as important. So, don’t obsess about;
1: The past: remember always that it’s done, it’s finished. Spending too much time reflecting on it won’t change it.
3: Another person’s behavior: sure we have all obsessed at some point or other about why a certain person behaved towards us in a certain way, but obsessing won’t change that person’s behavior. Either you accept that person’s behavior or you decide to find people whose behavior you can accept.
4: An unaccepted apology: Sure we all make mistakes, and as humans our best bet is to apologize for these mistakes. We do that hoping that the other person keeps an open heart and forgives us, and we are hurt if they don’t. Now don’t waste too much of your time beating yourself up about the unaccepted apology. You apologized, you did the right thing. It is up to the other person to accept it. Their failure to do so says more about them then it does about you.
5: Unrequited love: So you opened your heart and were met with a brick wall, you are allowed to be hurt for a while, but then you have to turn around and look for another place worthy of your open heart.
6: A broken promise: Yes, in an ideal world, a person making a promise should keep it, but we need to accept that we don’t live in an ideal world. So, if you are met with a broken promise move on! Find someone who can keep their promises to you.
7: Negative feedback: This one is a simple question of mathematics, where you need to remember that the world’s population exceeds 7 billion inhabitants. You simply can’t expect the 7 billion members of the globe’s population to give you positive feedback. Don’t beat yourself up if someone says you are negative, ugly, angry, stubborn, etc. This is their view. They are 1 out of 7 billion, and there must be other people amongst the 6.9 billion left who have something more positive to say about you.
8: Your physical imperfections: Don’t worry too much about the big nose, fat hand, overbite, or messy hair. No one is perfect and everyone is beautiful.
10: Overeating: Food is good, and you enjoyed it. So, move on. Don’t be the boring person eating a green salad at McDonald’s. If you are in McDonald’s have that Big Tasty, large fries, and large coke, or have the diet coke if, like me, you prefer its taste. Life is short it is ok to treat yourself to a binge.
11: Being lied to: Remember people lie, it is a fact of life, don’t spend too much time being hurt over the lie you were told. Just remember that once you uncover a lie that fact says more about the liar then it does about you.
12: Losing money: You make the money the money doesn’t make you, If you lose cash just learn to live on less, or find ways to increase your income, and soon you will realize that life is just as happy. The only reason people die from loss of cash is because they let their financial status define who they are. Don’t let it define you.
13: Not living the life you dream about: Just remember that no one has the privilege of living just as they would have liked. Some of our dreams are unachievable, and some we can work towards. Don’t obsess too much about what you didn’t achieve and work honestly for what you can achieve. More importantly, celebrate the things you did accomplish instead of worrying about those still in the making.
14: Losing a job: Sure when you hear the words “You’re fired” you will feel like a failure . Dwell on it for a short time only, and then remember that this is an invitation to actually think about what you want to do next in life. Get on the job hunt, and soon you will find that the next perfect job is round the corner. Open yourself up for chance.
15: Rejection: The person rejecting you or even refusing to listen to you is only one of 7 billion, again the rejection says more about them than it does about you.
In conclusion, really life is too short and you are too important to spend it obsessing about the very things that make you human.